Three weeks ago now I left Berkhamsted School and a role I had loved as a Deputy Head. I have two sons, one of whom is autistic, and I wanted to be around more for them. As a family we also wanted to relocate to the West Country.
I became a teacher in January 2009. I loved my profession. Leaving it was, to be honest, a wrench. I was nervous about the loss of structure and suspected I had become ‘institutionalised’ – making a coffee at break time, even during the holidays!
Ten weeks on from our move to Cheltenham I have learned some important lessons:
1)     Be patient! This has not been easy study. I am slowly moving from a “do it now” mindset to one of “trust the process.” Often a pace setter at work, I am learning to be realistic about expectations and goals. I am enjoying the ride, in a way I hadn’t done previously.
2)     Trust your skills. In a hierarchical organisation you are told who your team are. I was worried without that team I would be lonely. I have realised that creating a team is what I do best. Within three weeks I have over 10 people working with me to renovate our home. I have enjoyed introducing them to each other, getting to know their strengths (and how they like their tea). I have always been able to create a team, it was my skill in doing this, not the structure of the organisation that mattered!
3)     Challenge your assumptions. I confess I had made a big mistake. I had assumed that my job title, the name of my employer and the organisational structure was why people respected me, where my self-worth came from, and which provided me with intellectual challenge. I worried that in giving up my role I would stagnate and decline. But I learned that my skills, strengths and abilities are not tied to an institution or a sector. I have these innately and I continue to work on them. I am more than just a job title.
4)     Believe in community. I made this move to benefit our community of four. But I know I also needed a wider community. I have become a ‘say yes’ person, putting my self-forward, harnessing my ability to bring people together and meeting new people. I have always believed in asking for help. It takes courage to be vulnerable but the result is so powerful: a sense of solidarity, the realisation that you are not alone, and the making of connections.
Finally, one real piece of self-awareness: Of the things I can control, none of the bad things I thought might happen have happened. In no small part because I have been courageous, embraced being out of my comfort zone and have smiled along the way!